Right now, I'm supposed to be singing I Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor. Honestly.

Tonight has been fucking mad. For all the below reasons:

1) Fucking hell, it's nearly half 3 and I ain't in bed. Fuck.

2) There has been a free bar since midnight. I've just made it back from the venue.

3) Whilst putting my coat away, I was stood behind Andy Rourke, who was purchasing a "comedy" Chinese moustache.

4) The Ordinary Boys played live. Preston is the thickest fucker I've heard speak to an audience in a while. I spent the gig chanting "Chantelle".

5) Andy Rourke gave my mates the evils for dancing behind him. That was the funniest point of 2006 so far.

6) There was a free bar. Not just bottles or glasses of wine, but a FREE FUCKING BAR. I think I'm drunk.

7) Karaoke. But not in the usual sense. You pick the tune, and then get to sing it with a LIVE FUCKING BAND. That means guitars, bass, drums and all the trappings.

8) I'm supposed to be doing the Arctic Monkeys right now. Did I mention that? I fucking bailed before my moment was up.

9) Free, free, free booze. Abso-fucking-lutley free. All of it. Perfect.

10) Guy Garvey was there. "It's not a party without Garvey."

ANyway, I should really get to bed. I've got to get up in 4.5 hours. My spreadsheets are going to be awesome tomorrow.

Goodnight.

Grammar.

PS - Come to High Voltage tomorrow. Help she can't swim (!) are playing and it'll be dead good.